One of my favorite books is Leadership and Self-Deception, put out by the Arbinger Institute. I have always love self-improvement and goal making, but I didn't do very much reading of self-improvement books until about 2 years ago. I read Leadership and Self- Deception, and this book pushed me into a healthy obsession with leadership books.
While reading it I learned ways I had betrayed myself, and justified certain patterns of behavior. Such as yelling at my kids, or getting reacting a certain way when I expected my husband help with a task. In my faith, we believe agency is the biggest reason we are placed here in this world. We are here to make good choices, and prove to our Father in Heaven, and ourselves, that we are worthy of Eternal Salvation. The oppositions plan is to limit our ability to use that agency wisely by placing obstacles in our way. Obvious examples are drugs and other addictive behaviors. Sneaky examples are our attitudes toward people, and dishonesty with ourselves and others. When we are dishonest and justify that dishonesty we limit the ability of others to make a good choice because they don't have a full view of the situation.
When I got online this morning to write this post, I found this fantastic explanation of the book, far better than anything I could write on the subject. I highly recommend this book as well as it's companion book The Anatomy of Peace.
So you have all these great ideas, and you've got your goals, but how do you make it happen. I am going to choose a simple goal of reading 10 self-help book this month. Maybe that's not your goal, but you can still apply these ideas to whatever YOUR goals are.
1. You have to make a plan- saying "I want read 10 books this month" does you no good if you don't pick up the book. You have to make a plan to fit that into your day.
Which 10 books are you going to read? What time of day are you going to fit that into your schedule? Post your goals where you can see them, along with your plan to achieve those goals. Make a vision board, but some inspiration up on your wall. Those silly little quotes may be what gets you to read on that day that you were really busy and tired.
2.Start with small steps- You aren't going to start with all 10 books at the same time. You'll probably get more out of your efforts if you only do one or two at a time. maybe 1 audio book and 1 paper book to start with.
3. Keep on keepin' on- after you follow through your plan and finish 2 books, work on the next two on your list. Rinse, Lather, Repeat.
Now what do you do when you hit a wall. Most people will sabotage their own success over and over and over. If that sounds like you, don't give up. When you persevere you will eventually get a taste for success, and stop sabotaging yourself-or at least do it less often. What motivates you to get through these walls?
Your why! What is your reason for wanting to achieve this goal? For me reading motivational books is..... well, motivating. It's part of a bigger goal to have a successful business. It means I am continually in a place of trying to improve myself, and stay focused on my other goals. What do YOUR goals mean to you? Find some secific things you can physically DO. Go for a walk, yoga, eating healthier, lifting weights, some sort of art or creative work. Physically doing things will activate different parts of your brain and help you stay inspired to achieve your goals.
Thursday is the day I spotlight an essential oil, or oils. So today I bring you "MOTIVATE". As clearly stated by it's name it is a blend of oils which help motivate you to get moving. There is a science to aromatherapy. The certain smells activate specific parts of the brain. That's something for Science Satruday, but I want you to know it isn't all in your head. (Well... I guess it is actually, ha ha... Get it? Oh dear ) You can put it in a diffuser, or on a pendant. Rub some into your hands and cup your hands over your nose, then take a nice deep breath. You will be surprised how much something like a smell can help you keep pushing.
Anyway, you can read more about motivate in the document below.
Last Sunday it was my turn to teach in "The Relief Society". The Relief Society is an organization of woman in our church whose mission is to serve others. Teaching in front of this group of women has always been intimidating for me, and overcoming that fear is actually one of the things on my list of goals.
The first time I taught I was so nervous. I had a crowd full of blank stares and very little participation. I was mortified when I went home, I felt like I had failed at serving Heavenly Father, and I was embarrassed about my public speaking skills. Previous to that I had not EVER taught a large class like that. SOOO needless today I was very nervous about teaching this time. However, I got to choose my topic, and chose one of my favorites, making and setting goals. I wanted to take the opportunity to share with you all exactly what I shared with these wonderful women. This class went SO much better than my first. I had so much more participation, and it was because I was teaching on subject I am passionate about. Self Improvement fuels me! These are my notes. It's not in any perfect format, my sources aren't sited here, this isn't something I inteded to publish. Simply my notes. I used several talks for this lesson, as well as notes from a webinar done by Tiffany Peterson ( Highly Recommend!).